Photo Friday - April 21 - Golden

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The Dimmer Switch that Controls the World

Me: the air conditioning isn't working in the little apartment.Bigness: it was working just fine the last time I checked.Me: its not working now.Bigness: is the refrigerator working?Me: I don't know.Bigness: . . . are you sure its not working?Me: I know how to turn an air conditioner on.Bigness: why do you need air conditioning?Me: that's not the point, the point is that its not working. I tried changing the plug and neither plug on that wall is...

We're Ready

Bigness has been working on the big renovation since September, off and on, and since January in serious earnest getting it ready to rent. I didn't take any before photos, because I am unable to record such nastyness. Like Miss Lois, Bigness is a hands-off-landlord. He expects 3 things from his tennants, pay your rent on time, keep the place clean and in good working condition and don't freakin complain...

They Don't Make them like this Anymore

I found this story in a blog written by her son-in-law about Miss Lois, resident of Caye Caulker and recenly deceased (last year) at a ripe old age of 94. She was something else. I met her shortly after moving to Caye Caulker and she introduced me to Belizean real estate practices and told the most fascinating and hilarious stories. Miss Lois is mentioned in a book written by her daughter Anne Southerland, I think the book is called Belize, Globalization...

Whale, Whin I Wuz in Kowlige....

Write something funny a friend told me...Now I'm under pressure.I could write about Bigness whispering sweet nothings in my ear, a prelude to getting busy "Babes, bring me a ham & cheese sandwich when you come back... and 2 cokes"I took too long and he had baked a sheet of chocolate chip cookies and eaten 1/2 of them...But that's not all that funny, it doesn't involve torture.-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Here...

Photo Friday Submission - April 7 - Organized

Organized chaos at a street market in Playa Del Carmen Mexico. Details from three photos put together into one image. Shot during the Easter holiday 2005 with an old old old Olympus Comedia that I bought from a friend. Bigness and I took a little trip to to Mexico and became tourists ourselves. The camera has been handed down to MCS now and I also use it as a backup for weddings... just in case.Click...

Irony

Night Shift: Slightly Too Big Booty Cop making out with his girlfriend Fish Face the Cow and the police station radio is blasting Gloria Gaynor "I Will Survive."Conclusion I drew from this: smart police officers make out with their girlfriends under the stairs behind the police station while on night duty, dumb ones do it right at the front desk with their girlfriend on their lap, and the sarge upstai...

Riverwalk Purple Passion

A few days ago we went to the mainland with friends to Riverwalk Nursery between Belmopan and San Ignacio. The colors were glorious. Our friends bought travelers palms, we bought a mango tree and 3 coffee roses which have tiny white flowers that smell like gardenia. Ornamental Peppers (I think) Purple Bouganvi...

Big News on Caye Caulker

The police have started a manhunt for a local tour guide, because he broke into his neighbor's house and stole all her panties.Too weird to be a lie.News at 11.I totally nabbed the cartoon off of Vitrolica's Webb's ...

Lost in Translation

A quick trip to Chetumal Mexico (civilization) to the Mall Las Americanas for printer parts and a Big Mac with fries. we leave at 6 a.m. and arrive back home on the mainland at 6 p.m.I'm speaking Spanish to the immigration officer coming into Mexico answering a few simple questions about where I'm from and where I'm going. He understands most of what I'm mushmouthspeaking.In the mall I'm speaking Spanish, I'm saying Spanish words, they are a bit...

Interview with United Nations Baby

Me: smile for Gma, let me take your picture.She: (sh*t eating grin) Me: give me a real smileShe: it IS real Me: what's your favorite toy?She: sticky tapeMe: note to self - stop buying dolls and plastic crap and just give her a big roll of duct tape, oh, wait a minute, I might wake up one morning and she's ductaped her mother to the bed, like how she locked her mother in the bedroom... but that's...

Illustration Friday - March 31 - Spring

She had the whole love spell thing going on, with the scent of gardenia. I know about these things. I had a love spell on me for a while, but had to scrub it off, too much of a nuisance. Men following me everywhere, I would turn around and hiss at them like a snake to get them to back off. I warned Bigness about it, but he fell right into the trap, like a flower to the bee. This is a photo illustration...

A Study in Pink

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