Are them eyeballs under warranty?

I might have to send Bigness back to the evil Castro for more eye surgery, while he's still under warranty.This morning he asked me if I wanted raisins in my porridge.I said yes.He set the bowl in front of me and had sprinkled chocolate chips on top.I wasn't very successful at stifling a laugh.That was GOOD!New discove...

Fact Checker and banana bread recipe

My friend - Fact Checker - has asked me for my banana bread recipe 3 times - and I've given it to her - 3 times. She always asks the same question: How do you get your banana bread so brown?"I dunno." I answer.The first time I met Fact Checker, she asked me if I was here on a work permit or residency. Well, that's a nice how-do-you do, its none of your business madam, kinda question, but since you asked, I have permanent residency and a business...

If I was a Paper Doll

If I was a paper doll, this is what I would look like, including the hair color, glasses, pink spongy platform sandles (with socks) and butterfly earrings.You can make your own paper doll at http://elouai.com/doll-makers/candybar-doll-maker.phpHours and hours of fun.I want to read the Italian version of the "Rough Guide to Belize". I want to find the passage where it says "If you're really rude and...

Lee's Rough Guide to Dating in Belize

Ladies, follow these 5 easy rules for relationship success1. He can't be married or living with anyone. Any time you see a woman walking towards you with a machette, its not a good thing.2. He has to have a job and be able to maintain himself. Tip off #1, if he's standing around shooting the breeze on the street in the middle of the day, he doesn't have a job.3. The job can not be selling drugs. I know, I'm getting kinda picky here, but its for your...

What I did this week

Bigness and I went to Chetumal Mexico to buy printer parts, go to the Mall Las Americas, eat at MacDonalds and see a movie. Oh, we also went to smuggle peaches into Belize, but shh, don't tell anyone. Its about a 3 hour drive from our house on the mainland (which is between Belize City and Belmopan) to the northern border and the mall is about 20 minutes from the border on the Mexican side. One good...

Eww, that's weird

I just got a whiff of something. I think freaky white granny wears the same perfume as ...

Photo Friday Challenge - August 26 - Chaos

Shot in Playa Del Carmen, Mexico with an old Olympus Comed...

Illustration Friday - August 26 - Dreams

I don't remember my dreams so often, although I know I dream a lot, that is, when I can get my body to settle down enough, and shut off my mind.The Dream:I was walking on a narrow jungle path through a stand of bamboo growing dense and close. I could feel the cool smoothness of the bamboo as I pushed them aside to go on down the trail. I came to a bend in the path and just around the curve was a small...

Illustration Friday - August 19 - Reflection

My friend Irene reflects upon leaving San Marcos, Guatemala on Lake Atitlan. Our 3 day trip to escape the heat of September in Belize turned into 3 weeks of mountainous cool where we chilled our brains, practiced yoga, meditation, learned Reiki and drank lots of red wine. The image is a hand colored illustrated photo. I first make a print on Arches 140lb. watercolor paper and then color it with oil...

Photo Friday Challenge - One

One Avocado and a recipe for GuacamoleThe trick to perfect quacamole is using good, ripe avocados. Check for ripeness by gently pressing the outside of the avocado. If there is no give, the avocado is not ripe yet and will not taste good. If there is a little give, the avocado is ripe. If there is a lot of give, the avocado may be past ripe (rotten) and too mushy.Ingredients:2 ripe avocados½ purple...

Meet the new neighbor

To protect the guilty, let's just call her Freaky White Gial Granny and Nasty Stud Bwai. It sounds like Granny likes a spanky. Seriously, these walls are way too thin, I need to get some ear plugs and I'm going to need counseling soon to cope with their relationship. Common sense would tell you that if you can hear my TV, I can hear you screwing. (she's GOT to be faking her orgasm.) Maybe I'll punish them with ENYA turned up REAL loud.Remember: we...

Thank goodness for Babelfish

I made a sign in English, German, Italian, French, Spanish, Portugese, Chinese, Japanese, and Dirty Knees that says PLEASE, NO SMOKING. Thank goodness for Alta Vista's Babelfish. For the uninitiated, here's the link. Babelfish The sign is not meant to offend anyone, although I'm sure it will. Its meant to gently remind people that they are in a very nice air conditioned store that smells nice and...

I must have looked like I had STUPID tatooed on my forehead

Ahhhh.... the Italians have arrived.I was given a painstaking explanation, in English, this morning, by someone from a country that begins with the letter I, that Zey vood like waaaan explaaaaaaaaaaaaasso.I answered, Sure! Which in perky Americanish is the same as o.k., or yes, right now, or right away. I turned around to push the button on our Gaggia (Italian) superautomatic espresso machine and...

Does this look safe to you?

Does this look safe to you? Yes, another photo from the now famous verandah into the police yard. Looks like a MOLOTOV COCKTAIL goin' on down there. I wonder how long its been like that and I just didn't notice, sorta kinda like the baby milk in my coffee incident, but in a much more flammable way. Am I just being premenstrual about this? Doesn't that look like a giant bomb waiting to go off. I'm...

Illustration Friday Aug. 12 - Wisdom

This is a watercolor, no actually its mixed media because I used a little bit of oil pastel and prismacolor pencil to finish it. It honors the wise medicine women of Belize like Beatrice Waight, Hortense the midwife and Dr. Rosita Arviga. During the period of time I was painting this, I was also reading Rosita Arviga's book "Sastu...

Photo Friday Aug. 12 - Violet

The photo is actually 3 photos layered one on top of the other, I then made a giclee print on Arches 140lb. watercolor paper and hand colored it with oil pastel, primacolor pencils and watercolor penci...

This is what happens when I'm not paying attention

The can on the left side of the picture is KLIM, which is full cream milk powder. It only took me 3 years to realize it was the word MILK spelled backwards. Fresh milk in Belize is very very expensive, about 12 bzd a gallon ($6 U.S.) so we drink the powder version, which is very good and creamy. Its not like the nonfat powder stuff my mom used to force feed us as kids. The memory of that still makes...

Operation Milagros

Mr. Bigness went to Cuba on Sunday to have his eye surgery and will be back in about 10 days… Its a fabulous and very much needed program that these 3 governments are sponsoring.Belize Times Article Link (this news clip is about the first group of patients, Bigness is in the 2nd group)He called last night from Cuba and said they weren’t feeding him enough, and he was hungry and wanted to come home....

Fashion Police

Caught on the spycam, Granny and Grampy in their matching Mansarongs and Tevas, slinking past the fashion police stati...

Something really important happened

Something really important happened, although I don’t know what it was… Someone special came to Caye Caulker, but I don’t know who. I was on my verandah (porch) MINDING MY OWN BUSINESS, washing the laundry with my fully manual washing machine and I looked down into the police yard. I noticed that they had raked and chopped (with a machete) their yard, and had neatly stacked the empty beer bottles,...

New discoveries and same ole same old

It seems like I’ve been offline forever, its been 2-1/2 weeks of back and forth computer repairs. As usual the very expensive computer repair was completely the fault of our local electric company. The island is powered by 2 giant diesel engines. It appears that they are having a problem with the big engine (maybe they should remember to put fuel in it this time) so they are using the little engine,...

Illustration Friday August 6-Empty

This submission is for Illustration Friday. The peice is actually called La Solidad (the aloneness) Its my favorite quiet spot when I want to get away and read I go here. The peice is a hand-colored photo. I shot the photo and made a giclee print on Arches 140 lb hot press watercolor paper. The coloring is done with oil pastel, prismacolor pencil, iridescent oil sticks and watercolor pencil.YeAh!...

Still experiencing technical dificulties

ARRRRGGGHHHHH! Ouch, I just bit the inside of my mouth. Just let me vent here for a little bit. That way I can go home and NOT yell at Mr. Bigness for tracking sand into the house. I'm at the cybercafe again, which is so inconvenient, not to mention expensive, paying for internet at $12 an hour, since I'm already paying $100 a month for a DSL connection at home. I went to Belize City today to pick up my computer and $113 later (plus $35 for the...