Photo Friday - Dec 30 - Best of 2005

Drive By #2 - Belize City, Bel...

Well, I didn't think it was thaaaat funny.

Its nice to know that someone else has a more viscious and sarcastic sense of humour than moi. (Middle Child Syndro...

Postcards from Paradise

Each year for Christmas I like to send out an "Eat Your Heart out" photo to my parents. Healthy, tanned, smiling. Middle Child Syndrome took my photo this year and amazingly came up with about 8 really nice shots, of which I won't share with you... because I think you'll enjoy the out-takes better. I swear I wasn't trying to act like a 3 year old with ADD.Just Remember Fugly is the New Pretty.This...

Happy and Merry

I heisted this off of Natalie Dee's website.What will I remember the most about today? No, it won't be the list of food my mother ate today, that she will inevitably email me later on, that will go something like this: This morning your Dad and I had decaf and cinnamon buns that I got at the thrift store 3 packages for $1, then we went over to your Aunt Margies for lunch after church and your cousin...

Letter From Santa

Dear Baby Girl,Your Grandma is so smart! When you wouldn't take a shower the other night, after you covered yourself in dirt and sand, and she put you in the cooler with bubble water (and then took your picture) I decided to reward her this year for Christmas. Don't tell her, but I'm bringing a new 1 speed beach cruiser bike with big booty seat, basket and rust resistant chain. If she gets real lucky...

The Bump in the Road

I'm glad I was oblivious of what was going on. I was just ridin de bus and trying to make sure I was there when the plane came into Cancun.Little did I know what was going down...---------------------------------------------------------------Email from Middle Child Syndrome:Well my trip is off to a great start. I packed up the car and ran into the apartment for one last thing (Halima and my purse) and walked back out to find NO CAR in the parking...

Illustration Friday - Dec 16 - Imagine

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Photo Friday Dec 16 Depth of Field

Hey, thanks to everyone for voting for me on the Weblogawards. http://weblogawards.org/2005/12/best_latino_caribbean_or_south.php...

Don't Let the Door Hit You On Your Way Out

“Psst.. Miss Miss, how much for a coffee?”I look around for where the sound is coming from and see the sweet Kriole police officer standing at the vent window next to the café kitchen. The window faces the police yard and is a direct shot into their duty office.“2 bzd ($1 U.S.) for a small and 3 bzd ($1.50 U.S.) for a large” I answer.“Its not for me its for my prisoners” he declares.I look past him and see the backs of two dyed blonde heads in the...

Changes in Plans and Missionaries on the Move

4:30 p.m. the phone rings - Is this Mr. Bigness? Be at the international airport at 10 a.m. tomorrow, you're going to Cuba.4:31 p.m. What?With Bigness in Cuba for eye surgery, I'm leaving today to go to Cancun to pick up Middle Child Syndrome and Baby Girl. I'll be back on Sunday. Notice to would-be burglars, I've left the wild kittens and sand crabs in charge of security.Perhaps you don't know my feelings about missionaries, unless you've heard...

Photo Friday - December 2 - Experimental

This photo is called Market Day in Belize Ci...

Hallooooo, You Reach Da Caye Caulker Compleeyn Depaaatmen

I'm thinking about putting a comments box and questionaire outside my door so I can stop answering the phone. I'll paint a sign that says "Comments? Suggestions? Complaints?" with a big arrow pointing to the box.The police choose from time-to-time to not answer their phone.I can hear it ringandringandringandring until the phone company shuts the ring off after about 20 rings.How can nobody be home at the police department?Then my phone starts to...

Illustration Friday - Dec 2 - Blue

This peice is called Eyes of the Medicine Woman its 45" x 45". It is hand painted silk using the French Serti Technique of fencing in areas you want to paint. You first stretch the silk like canvas on a stretcher frame, then you treat the silk and paint. Its controlled chaos. The results are usually surprising.A few years back I went to see a medicine woman. A real live Belizean medicine woman way...

I feel so self conscious

I've been nominated for Best Caribbean Latino South American Bloghttp://weblogawards.org/2005/12/best_latino_caribbean_or_south.phpVote for me!Vote every day!I want that free trip to Good Mornin Uhmerika!I guess I'm over my shyne...

Shake It You Won't Break It

BLAM! I hear, and the house shakes.What happened? I call from the bedroom where I'm uploading files on my computer.Nothing. Bigness answers sheepishly.A few minutes later I walk out to our kitchen and look at the sliding glass door that leads to the verandah. I see a greasy face print about 7 feet up the glass. He's lucky he didnt break his nose, knowing how he walks full tilt all the time. I realize too late... Oh, I forgot to put the tape X on...

More Gorgeous Sunsets (Yawn)

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Photo Friday Nov 26 - Yellow

Yellow Hibiscus. Shot in the late afternoon in Placencia, Belize with a Canon Digital Rebel EOS.This could meet the yellow challenge also. The photo was shot on November 24, 2005 and was the sunset view of the wedding reception. By the time I hauled ass down to the split (the channel between the north and south part of the island) the boat had sailed off into the sunset. Oops! You can barely make...

Illustration Friday - Nov 26 - Small

The original 24" x 24" art is hand-painted silk using te serti technique. I've made it into tiles and boxes that are available at http://www.cafepress.com/caribbeancolors/636708What inspired me: This little froggy was hugging up my screen door one morning in October. He was eating the insects that had gotten stuck to the screen after the outdoor light was on all ni...

False Advertisement for Getting Married

On Thanksgiving, I photographed a wedding for a Canadian couple (judging from their accents) People who get married here on Caye Caulker aren't looking for a traditional wedding, so it follows suit that their photos won't be traditional either, which is a good thing, since my photos are left of center.I never look at the groom, it doesn't matter what he looks like, its the bride that's the most important...

What I did on my birthday

45 is a big one, in my opinion. Half way through the decade, where you're still rising, haven't quite arrived yet - still have a little bit of energy, but are smart enough to not make the same mistake 3 times.A good friend came over from San Pedro (the next island) for the night, plus bigness's oldest daughter and kids were here for the weekend, we all went out for dinner. My friend brought a cake...

High Season has officially started

Middle daughter isn't here yet, we're still trying to make arrangements. The hurricane that wiped out Cancun/Playa Del Carmen threw a monkey wrench into the mix. Its a question of time vs. money now.This season promises to be a great one, with many other Caribbean and Mexican destinations ripped to shreds, if we can keep from killing off the tourists. Belize has had a rash of tourist deaths in the last few weeks. The body count is at 5 now (plus...

Zee Zzzwizzz Beckpeckers Hev Arrive

Zey kyam fram Ondurazzz end r so heppy to find a kleeen playz to itttt.Ja vole.Vat tiiime do you epen in ze morgen?Seben?Veeee vill be heeeer.Vee heeere about zee koffeeee.Vee loooffff Koffeeeeee.Strongggg Koffeeee.(I'm sure they make fun of my accent too)Zaye loook at me and vonder isss she spenish or is she amerikanish?Note to self: time to get the NO SMOKING in six different languages sign out aga...

I fell asleep and when I woke up...

... there was a giant tropical storm right in front of me. Toto, we aren't in Kansas anymore.Anyone else watching the weather channel out there?Where the heck did this big ugly thing come from? ... and why?As of 9 p.m. central time (Friday night) the storm has organized and moved northwest. The stopped running the boats at 5 p.m. today, so whoever is left here isn't going anywhere. No diving trips,...

And they said it couldn't be done

Bigness: Babes, how many of this do I put in the jello (holding up a 14 ounce coffee mug)Me: how many packages of jello?Bigness: 2Me: big or small packsBigness: bigMe: well that's 14 ounces, so each mug is 1-3/4 cups and each package takes 4-8oz. cups of water ( I whip out my brain calculator) so you should put 4-1/2 mugs of water to make 2 packs.Bigness: Oh...Me: WhatBigness: I put 8Me: do wehave any more jello in the cupboard?Bigness: no, but its...

You know you're living on a small island when...

The owner of Dreadlock Pasta tells you that you're not allowed to serve any kind of pasta since there's the word pasta in the name of her business. --Bigness chased her down the street with the machette for that one. Any of you initiated into Belize know which crazy house I'm taking about. I changed the name to protect the guilty.I'm in the hardware store yesterday and the drunk policeman (there's one in every small town) told me that he heard...

Meet Jennifer

http://jradventures.blogspot.com/Jennifer came into my store last night and is traveling for 5-1/2 months. Costa Rica to Belize to the Cook Island to India to Vietnam to Paris to London, and I'm sure I've missed a place or five. Check out her blog as she posts her travelogue, don't forget to tell her I sent you. She's had some great adventures so far, and told me a story or two last night over veggie lasag...

Girls Gone WIld

I am really really trying to get a picture of the police woman in combat boots, really I am, if they would stop looking at me. The Seargent is very suspicious of me with that camera hanging off my face most of the time."Saaaage, may I please take a picture of Girls Gone Wild on the desk" hoping to shift the camera a bit and take in the edge of big momma's combat boots."What you do with that komra...

Near, Far and Cant Stop Playing This Game

Weather Report: its 85 and sunnyI've had the weird headache again - all week, which is very unusual for me. I never get headaches, well hardly ever. Its behind my eyes and at the base of my skull on the left side.And I can't stop playing this gamehttp://files.deviantart.com/f/2004/188/8/7/gridgame.swfMy high score was 2470.So amuse yourselves for a while, its like opening a bag of potato chips -...

Illustration Friday - Nov 4 - Night

This peice is titled "Midnight" and was on exhibition at the House of Culture in Belize City July-August 2005, then moved to the George Price Center for Peace in Belmopan, Belize. The GPC is where all the big government meetings take place in Belize. The inspiration was from vintage erotic photography from the 1920s. The peice is oil pastel, prismacolor pencil and oil pai...

Fashion Police Ruling

Spanish man wear man-prix pants nice,White man just look silly.Photos later.Update:Speaking of Fashion Police. Our female officer here on Caye Caulker has taken to wearing combat boots with her skirt uniform. The first time I saw that I was... huh? Is that what I think it is, and not the fashionable black ankle socks and black oxfords that we've come to know and love?I think I'll bribe her with a brownie and ask her the classic question... Did your...

Rastaman Russell

Russell stopped by last night to have waaaa lee chat. He was telling me about how he eats grass and leaf and stick and tings. He told me that most fat girls with big belly comes from backway batty. I wonder what he meant.I asked Bigness if Russell eats grass and leaf and stick an tings, he said yeeeessss mon, he see Russell graze like cow and enjoy it.I'm still puzzling over what he meant by back w...

Price List for Answers

The tourists are coming, we're getting traveling refugees from all over Central America and the Yucatan because so far... we've been lucky with the weather. Its like a wave of foreigners hit the island yesterday. This year I've made up my new price list.I get asked the same questions over and over.Where are you from? $1How long have you lived here? $2Do you like living here? Dinner and drinksThink...

Halloween 2004

This is what happened to me last year when I lost count of my drinks at Popeye's Beach Halloween Party. The thought of going through this again is really repugnant. File this one in "Most Embarrassing Moments" I lernt my lessss...

Illustration Friday - Broken - Oct. 28

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Photo Friday - Oct. 28 - Delicate

Photo Friday submission for Oct. 28. This photo was shot in Southern Belize, west of Punta Gorda, near the Maya site Lubantum. We were at a butterfly farm where they breed blue morpho butterflies and others (can't remember the name of this one) for export to England. My friend's 4 year old daughter held perfecly still while butterflies landed on her and the red hibiscus. It was one of those magical...

Bread Baking, Pasta Salad Making and Impossible Spinach Quiche Pie

A big thank you to Google, without it I would be lost. I can't believe I'm in the food business - again.I grew up in the food business, when I was a child and young teen my parents had a catering company. Weekends were spent with my brothers (Einstein and Charles Manson) peeling 100 lbs. of potatoes and serving coffee to blue haired ladies at wedding showers. When I was a teenager my parents actually...

Secrets of the Jaguar Woman

I'm not into words today, just pictures and captions.This is a new release. The original art is created on hand-painted silk. I started by tye dying silk and hanging it out to dry, then I stretched the silk on a stretcher frame using a staplegun and the drew the mask using something called gutta. This style of silk painting originated in France and is called Serti technique which roughly translates...